Backgrounds are supposed to help you roleplay. Instead, they help you hijack the plot, derail the party dynamic, and make the DM regret asking for backstories, inviting these fools to the table, and generally existing. Let’s see how likely they are to cause drama before initiative even rolls.
Folk Hero: The Small-Town Narcissist
You saved a village once and now you think you’re the Chosen One. Every tavern visit becomes a humblebrag, and every NPC is expected to recognise you. You’re not a hero; you’re a local celebrity with delusions of grandeur.
Session Zero Impact: Will demand plot relevance by level 3.
Noble: The Walking Power Fantasy
You picked Noble because you wanted respect, wealth, and the ability to talk down to peasants. You’re here to roleplay succession drama and flex your family crest. Also, you expect the party to treat you like royalty.
Session Zero Impact: Will ask if the dungeon has valet parking.
Criminal: The Backstory Black Hole
You’ve got secrets. So many secrets. You won’t tell the party anything, but you’ll expect them to trust you. Your contacts are shady, your motives are unclear, and your alignment is “plot twist.”
Session Zero Impact: Will betray the party by arc two “for flavour.”
Sage: The Lore Dump Machine
You picked Sage because you wanted to know everything and say everything. You’ve read every book, studied every ruin, and will absolutely interrupt the DM to correct historical inaccuracies. You’re not a scholar; you’re a Wikipedia page with legs.
Session Zero Impact: Will write a 12-page backstory and expect everyone to read it.
Acolyte: The Preachy Plot Hijacker
You serve a god. That’s fine. But now every moral decision becomes a theological debate. You’ll guilt the rogue, judge the bard, and turn every quest into a pilgrimage. You’re not roleplaying; you’re evangelising.
Session Zero Impact: Will ask if the party can stop to build a shrine.
Entertainer: The Spotlight Addict
You picked Entertainer because you want attention. You’ll perform at every tavern, flirt with every NPC, and turn every downtime moment into a talent show. You’re not here for the quest; you’re here for the applause.
Session Zero Impact: Will derail the plot for a juggling contest.
Hermit: The Anti-Social Plot Anchor
You lived alone for years and now you’re in a party. You hate people, hate cities, and hate fun. You’ll sulk in the corner, refuse to share your backstory, and act surprised when no one bonds with you.
Session Zero Impact: Will say “I don’t trust anyone” and expect hugs.
Soldier: The Authority Complex
You were in the military. You have rank. You expect people to listen. You treat the party like a squad and the DM like a commanding officer. You’re not a team player; you’re a drill sergeant with a longsword.
Session Zero Impact: Will try to lead the party and get salty when they don’t follow orders.
Urchin: The Trauma Dump Speedrun
This is my usual one, truth be told… You grew up on the streets and you want everyone to know it. Every conversation is a chance to mention your tragic past. You steal things “because it’s all you’ve ever known” and cry during long rests.
Session Zero Impact: Will monologue about rats while looting.
Guild Artisan: The Capitalist Distraction
You’re here to network. You’ll ask if the dungeon has market potential, try to monetise the quest, and negotiate with monsters like they’re clients. Treasure and adventure is cool, but you’re really just here to expand your brand.
Session Zero Impact: Will ask if the party can open a franchise.
Outlander: The Wilderness One-Upper
You’re from the wilds. You hate cities, hate politics, and think you’re better than everyone. You’ll scoff at maps, refuse to use roads, and insist on foraging even when there’s a tavern nearby.
Session Zero Impact: Will say “I don’t understand your customs” every five minutes.
Charlatan: The Plot Saboteur
You lie. Constantly. To the party, to the NPCs, to yourself. You’ve got fake identities, shady motives, and a backstory that’s 90% deception. You think this makes you mysterious mysterious… It just makes you exhausting.
Session Zero Impact: Will fake their own death for attention.
No Rerolls 