You wanted flavour. You wanted flexibility. You wanted to be “unique.” What you got was a spreadsheet with abandonment issues. Let’s talk about multiclassing; the character creation equivalent of dating five people at once and forgetting all their birthdays.
Multiclassing starts with a lie: “I just want a little dip.” One level of rogue for sneak attack. One level of fighter for Action Surge. One level of warlock for Eldritch Blast. Before you know it, you’re a six-class, Akira-style monstrosity with no identity and a spell list that looks like a ransom note.
I’m sorry, fam, you’re not building a character any more. You’re building a cry for help. Let’s break down the component problems…
Problem 1: The Maths Is Lying to You
You thought it was simple. Just add levels. But now your proficiency bonus is lagging, your spell slots are a mess, and you need a flowchart to figure out if you can cast Shield. Your hit dice are mismatched, your subclass features are staggered, and your DM is visibly ageing.
Side effects include:
- Forgetting which class gets Extra Attack
- Accidentally multiclassing out of your own story arc
- Crying during level-up
Problem 2: Spellcasting Is a Dumpster Fire
Multiclass spellcasting is a cursed ritual. You combine spell slot tables like a tax accountant, but your known spells don’t scale. You’re a bard/sorcerer/warlock with 4th-level slots and only 2nd-level spells. You cast Fireball like it’s a favour from the gods.
Translation: You’ve got the spell slots of a demigod and the spell list of a raccoon.
Problem 3: You’re a Jack of All Trades, Master of Regret
You wanted versatility. What you got was mediocrity in four flavours. You’re not tanky enough to tank, not sneaky enough to sneak, and not magical enough to matter. You’re the party’s Swiss Army knife; useful, but nobody’s first choice.
Combat turns include:
- Asking “Wait, can I do this?”
- Googling your own character sheet
- Rolling with disadvantage because you forgot your armour proficiencies
Problem 4: Your Backstory Is a Mess
Multiclassing demands narrative justification verging on the gymnastic. You were a noble paladin who studied wizardry, then joined a rogue’s guild, then made a pact with a fiend… You’re not a character any more, so much as you’re just a lore salad. Your DM stopped reading your backstory after paragraph six. That was eight paragraphs too many.
Backstory beats include:
- “I was trained by many masters.”
- “I seek balance between all paths.”
- “I got bored and multiclassed, LOL.”
Problem 5: The Real Reason You Did It
Let’s be honest. You saw a Reddit post about a hexadin build and thought, “I want that.” You didn’t multiclass for flavour, no matter what pitch you reach in your squealing justifications. You multiclassed for damage. You’re chasing synergy like it’s a drug, and now you’re stuck explaining why your rogue has Divine Smite.
You’re not optimising. You’re coping.
No Rerolls 
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